Mutiny on the McHorseArse

Mutiny on the McHorseArse

21 PAX made a decision to post at the Horsey McHorseArse on Monday to challenge themselves for whatever the Q had in store some hills.

The PreBlast (that was Retweeted by @F3Metro):

Make sure your running in the dark skills are in order before the BRR: Bring a headlamp. There will be hills.

— Bratwurst (@bratwurst_f3) July 9, 2017

Bratwurst thinking to himself, “Man, the parking lot is a little dim.  Did any of the PAX get the memo about the Headlamp?”  StoneCold, “why are you really trying to sell this headlamp idea, do we really need it?”  ThinMint, “Ooh, I think I may have an extra headlamp in the car to give to a brother in need, here you go Teddy.”  Frasier, “I run faster than the light, I only need 1 lumens in my headlamp.”  TheMouth, “lucky I shook up my batteries before the run, that really works to help them last longer.”  Other Metro PAX, “Isn’t this workout all about Mt. Charlotte, the Yucca, the flagpole, and Chester?  Why do we need to deviate and/or prepare for anything other than that?”

At 0515 – Bratwurst, “follow me”.  Other Metro PAX, “Wait, what’s this gravel stuff and why are we using this Greenway where we park, for the first time?  It sure is nice with the streetlight, oh man, here we go under a dark bridge.  Do trolls live here?  Why is this paved greenway dark when all of Charlotte should be lit up with our property tax dollars?!”  After crossing over a bridge into the woods the PAX were like, “Gravel, why did you drop a cone with a flashing light on it, up a hill through the woods, gravel, what???  We’re out of here!  How do we get back to Chester?”

As the rest of the PAX continued at a mosey up the Boyce Hill into Boyce Park the gravel ended, and we started back down a hill, there were comments like, “are we near Independence?  Why are you dropping random little orange objects along the way?”  And then CRASH, a PAX bites the dust in a hole that he stepped OVER SAID CONE to dive into.  Quick check on the PAX, no visible blood (yet), so get continue to the bottom of the hill and regroup.  Question from the injured PAX, “What’s the shortest way back to the light and the paved surface?”  …  Directions given, “Head that way.”

And then we finally get to the point of the workout…Wheat had been separated from the chaff…Gideon had his army…  We were left with Geraldo, Alf, Stone Cold, Teddy, Turkey Leg, Baracus, Prohibition, Fire Hazard, and Chelms (a fine escort I must say).

1. We’re going to run at a hard effort back up this short steep asphalt hill, into and along the edge of the park, back down the trail to the bottom of the Boyce Hill where the flashing cone is, around the cone, and then return course (up hill, across park, down hill) to this starting point for a 1.1 mile interval.  There may be cracks, roots, and small animals on the trail, but you’ll be OK.  Modify if necessary.
2. Recovery mosey back along the flat trail bottom to the flashing cone for about 0.5 mile interval.
3. Now, run hard effort from flashing cone, on trail up the hill, into and along Boyce Park, down asphalt hill to the bottom (spin around the cone that wasn’t there — but was it ever there), now return course back up the hill (and call ahead to Frasier to go ask that cyclist who passed us going up the hill if he stole our cone…try to tire Frasier out… not possible even though Frasier did catch him), back up to and along the park, down the trail and hill, back to the flashing cone.  1.1 mile.
4. Recovery mosey back along the flat trail bottom to the start of the asphalt hill for about 0.5 mile interval.
5. Up the short steep asphalt hill…Keep doing this until time runs out, and meet at the flashing cone at 0610.

At 0610, only ThinMint was left at the flashing cone.  Apparently, all of the other PAX didn’t need to wait, were nervous to get back to COT in time, or wanted to try and catch the pledge to the flag.  Anywho, mosey a piece back to the lot to find all of the PAX tricking in, except for the unfortunate PAX that bit the dust in the dark on the hill.  Turns out the mutiny Pax were apparently scared of the same fate.  Instead, they went off in a search to find Chester, and FishWrap found him… but we’ll not describe how he left him.

Most of the PAX on the Boyce side of Sardis got in at least 3 intervals.  Some got a half more.  In all, probably 25 minutes of solid effort (and mind exercise / awareness in the dark) with ample recovery.  Strava flyby = http://labs.strava.com/flyby/viewer/#1076589010?c=7zzzzzzz&z=4&t=0

At 0615 at the parking lot, the faces that were once in the dark, came back into the light.  Next time, we’ll try to do a better job getting the word out for headlamps, though this is BRR season and every PAX should have one handy at all times…making sure it has good batteries.  And from the start of the workout, instead of moseying and then giving directions, which is normally the case at a Bratwurst workout, we’ll give directions at the start you’ll just have to learn to trust the Q.  Perhaps pair up with a PAX that has a light.  Or maybe that’s just giving too much direction.

See you in the Gloom PAX,

Bratwurst

P.S.  It was an honor to lead some of you, thankfully some did follow, lick your wounds and come out again, and there will be more fun on the Horsey McHorseArse.