Removing your New Year’s Calluses

Removing your New Year’s Calluses

18 manly men posted at Meathead this morning for a completely stationary Meathead. After providing a thorough and well-rehearsed disclaimer, we proceeded thusly:

Warm-up:

• 2H swings x 20 OYO
• Halos x 5 each direction
• 2H swings x 20 OYO
• Around the world x 5 each direction
• 2H swings x 20 OYO

Set 1 (singles):

• 2H swings x 15
• Clean + press x 5 per side
• 1H swings x 5 per side
• Clean + squat x 5 per side
• Alternating 1H swings  x 20
• Snatch x 5 per side
• 2H swings x 15
• Snatch x 5 per side
• 1H swings x 5 per side

Partner up by bell size for doubles.

Set 2 (doubles):

• Clean + press x 3-5
• Clean + squat x 3-5
• Clean + press x 3-5
• Double swing x 3-5
• Clean + press x 3-5
• Single KB snatch x 5 per side
• Clean + press x 3-5

Set 3 (more doubles):

• Clean + squat x 3-5
• Double swing x 3-5
• Clean + squat x 3-5
• Clean + press x 3-5
• Clean + squat x 3-5
• Single KB snatch x 5 per side
• Clean + squat x 3-5

Consciously decouple from your partner for more singles.

Set 4 (more singles):

• 2H swings x 15
• Clean + press x 5 per side
• 1H swings x 5 per side
• Clean + squat x 5 per side
• Alternating 1H swings  x 20
• Snatch x 5 per side
• 2H swings x 15
• Clean + press x 5 per side
• 1H swings x 5 per side
• Clean + squat x 5 per side
• 1H swings x 5 per side

Metal Mary:

• Flutter press x 10 IC
• Russian twist x 10 IC
• Pullover + Louganis x 7 OYO

Moleskine:

• This workout is plagiarized cobbled together from Brett Jones’s Level I SFG training plan. I basically took parts of 2-3 days and crammed them together into a single workout. My only modification was to only run each set once. We went through the singles again because we had time. It was a little tough on the calluses (sorry, High Tide), but a good combination of singles and doubles.
• YHC is honored by the amazing turnout for my Q this morning (cough… best in Area 51… cough). It’s an honor to lead the pax and I appreciate the faith they showed in me this morning. Either that or they didn’t check the schedule/Twitter and just took their chances. #assumethebest
• Unfortunately, there are some notable exceptions to the bullet point above. Hairball hit up the A51 Slack channel last night, saying he was a free agent for this morning. The shirtless, dolphin-tattooed, marathon-running trichobezoar decided to post at Hydra instead. #waytocrosstrain Cheese Curd mangled his ankle last week at Kinetic Heights and hit YHC up on Sunday night about posting at Foxhole. He was dissuaded by the amount of running, but I mentioned I was Qing a 0.0 at Meathead this week. The BRR-captaining, visor-wearing lactophile probably decided to limp around his neighborhood instead of posting with us this morning. #yourloss We’re not even going to mention the usual defectors: Fletch, TR, Alf, etc. #comebackwemissyou #Bulldoggetsapassthisweek
• Enough negativity. Slice was (I believe) a Meathead FNG. An avid runner, he got swole at the Kiawah Marathon last month, but not in a good way. Literally, his ankle swelled up to kettlebell size. #cankle He’s taking a break from running and decided to post to Meathead to get a 0.0 beatdown. Great to have you out there and we hope you come back.
• It was also great to see Chanel back out at Meathead. My former co-site Q at Foxhole (a great Monday gear workout in SOBland #shamelessplug), Chanel is battling back from some injuries. Based on his recent posts, he’ll be leading the pack again soon. #GAR #beatSpacklertoit
• Meathead has always been known, no, renowned for its high mumblechatter quotient. This has grown exponentially with the return of Bananas and Probation. Mix in a little Brown and Runstopper and you’re lucky not to snarf a kettlebell. The best part of the morning was when YHC announced that there’d be no more snatches today and Bananas responded “Speak for yourself.” I might have made that too easy for him. #softball
• Runstopper was also kind enough to volunteer additional exercises to be performed while waiting for your partner to complete the doubles exercise. Those of us with man-sized bells didn’t do them, but he and Fireman Ed seemed to be having fun. #getabiggerbell
• Speaking of Fireman Ed, he was practically beaming with pride, rocking his Clemson shirt this morning. He and Chanel shared a tender moment recounting Monday’s game and asking High Tide where his Alabama shirt was. #lowblow
• Great to have Witch Doctor back out. YHC missed the last couple of Meatheads of 2016 due to travel and holiday drinking parties and hadn’t seen him in a while. He was easing his way back into the big bells, but will undoubtedly be crushing workouts again in no time like Hoover crushes door frames with his head. By the way, who is taller, Hoover or The Hoff? These are the kinds of things you ponder while writing a backblast when you should be working. #clashofthetitans
• Header is not a regular for Meathead. I think he showed up for the pre-run and decided to stick around to lift. #thanksbrother He, Chin Music and Freedom were crushing it over to my left, a little out of sight. I’m pretty sure they got sucked into the Bananas/Probation shenanigans, but they weren’t quite as badly behaved. Thanks for the take out, Freedom. #preacherscorner
• Despite standing directly across the circle from YHC, I don’t have anything amusing to point out about Blazing Saddles and Tackling Dummy. They were both grinding through a challenging workout. Apologies if I made random eye contact at any point. These things happen when you’re standing around in a circle. At least we weren’t doing monkey humpers… #awkward
• Soul Glo came in on two wheels, totally missing my disclaimer. If he ends up suing F3, it’s not my fault. I’m pretty sure he was swinging kettlebells around like baby rattles, because that’s what he always does. #younggun
• My boy, Brown. What can I say about such a colossal figure in the Area 51 0.0 kettlebell universe? Honestly, he was kind of slacking this morning. I think he misses having Horsehead‘s (#gluefactory) tailgate to lay down on for breaks, so he doesn’t push it too hard. I think he used a 45# kettlebell for part of the workout. You okay, bro? #restday
• Fault Line was taking his time on the doubles today, which is a great practice to maintain good form and prevent injury. This is about the only F3 workout where I can beat him, so I enjoyed it. #IhopetheBBwasworththewait

Announcements:

• Joe Davis Run – come on out and support a great cause. There will be a lot of F3 and FiA pax in attendance. See the South Charlotte region page for more info. Signups might still be open.