Hairburner Mile at the Brave

Hairburner Mile at the Brave

Light showing at the Brave this morning. The rundown of a few regulars and failed to show:

Madame Tussauds – drank himself silly after tax season at the Zac Brown concert
Flint – #flintcommitted
Bunker – Trying to validate his manhood by running a personal best at Kiawah, and has therefore given up all boot camp workouts. Fails to realize that no one cares about his marathon times.
Frehley’s – Frat brother weekend of golfing, boozing, and watching Clemson not beat a team by as much as they should #awinisawin. We all feel very, very sorry for the brothers that have to smell Frehley’s in the morning after a long night of boozing #weunderstand
Fahvra – sick of being a mile ahead of everyone, so he probably ran a marathon this morning, by himself, in under 2 hours. Bunker heard about it, got jealous, and his heart rate spiked all the way to 47.
Market Timer – had to work late because his clients have been losing more than they normally do.
Pebbles – declared his sabbatical from Slack, and must have forgotten about the workout. That, or it was too warm for his hoodie.
One-Niner – I don’t have anything to make fun of him for. Damn – I’ll have to work on that #backblastfail

For the unlucky 10 that did post, here’s how things went down:

Horrible disclaimer given (Mermaid would have given YHC a stern scolding, I’m sure). Mumblechatter begins. We’re off.

Thang:

Mosey to Johnston and B’tyne Commons (taking the long way to get in some mileage). Cross the street. SSH x 15 in front of Mellow Mushroom. Up the stairs, through the parking lot to that other street, past the parking deck to the fountain area. Merkins x 10 IC. IW x 15 IC. Mosey up that unknown street to B’Tyne Commons. Cross and hang a left to the picnic areas around the pond. 20 dips. Mosey a bit more to the benches for 15 derkins. Mosey a bit more for 15 jump squats next to the other building. Repeat that circuit once more after running through some mud.

Head over to the parking lot between two buildings off that one road for hairburner mile. Break off into 2 teams of 5. 3 times around the parking lot. Pax who aren’t hairburning run to the second cone, do 10 derkins, and then meet back to the ‘burner. Switch. Repeat that sequence until 3 full laps completed. It sucked.

Circle up for some quick Freddie Mercury. Q catches his breath.

Head over to building south of Loch Ness. 20 dips. 10 hip-slappers. 20 dips. 15 incline merkins. Mosey back to launch for Mary.

All IC x 15:

Dolly
Rosalita
American Hammer
H2H
Flutter

Finish off with some protractor and 30-second plank. Finito.

Moleskine

The hairburner mile is awful. Nothing more needs to be said. I was lucky that I got on a team with some hair-burning beasts of Thin Mint, Mario, Outback, and Fire Hazard. I definitely did not pull my weight. Everyone should have gotten in 3.5 – 4.5 miles.

Hope you all are as sore as I will be tomorrow.

Thanks to BT for the takeout. Have a great and safe weekend, boys.