Around the World in Twenty Merkins

  • When:07/29/16
  • QIC: Ickey Shuffle
  • The PAX: Chelms, Abacus, Pulp Fiction, Drop Thrill, Drop Thrill's Rucksack, Thunder Road, Bout Time, Dear Abby, Paper Jam, Snowflake, Marconi, Frazier, Ickey Shuffle


Around the World in Twenty Merkins

Friday morning saw a welcome break from the oppressive heat wave that July has brought.  The pre-dawn hour and the wind chill combined to bring the temperature down to a brisk 92 degrees.  Twelve set out to get some work in before gunning for their tour cards at the golf tournament later in the day.  The disclaimer was probably mostly correctly given and we set out to play Frogger across 51.

Warmup:

  • Mosey to the Jack in the Box parking lot at a sensible pace for COP
  • 20 SSH IC
  • 15 Mountain Climbers IC with bonus criticism of the Q’s form
  • 10 IW IC
  • 5 Diamond Merkins IC
  • Mosey to the front of Amalie’s for the next phase

Around the World:

YHC wanted to find some new bits of ground to explore at Centurion, which was challenging since the regular rotation of Q’s does a phenomenal job of utilizing the CCHS grounds, the shopping center where Panera is (YHC can’t remember the name, probably Carmel something or other), Carmel Crossing Drive and accompanying hills, and the practice fields and parking lots in the immediate vicinity.  Carmel Commons seemed ripe for the picking since we sometimes utilize the Jack in the Box and McDonald’s parking lots but not much else.  So, while driving the 2.1 to daycare one day and sitting on 51, YHC took stock of the various eateries in the plaza and came up with this bit of nonsense called Around The World.It consists of running along the shopping center sidewalk and stopping at every restaurant that  serves the cuisine of a different nation to perform 20 merkins, 20 LBCs, 20 squats, 20 Russian twists, and 20 plank jacks. We began at Amalie’s which sounds like a French place so YHC gave the PAX the option to substitute monkey humpers for any exercise to punish the first stop for the sin of being and/or sounding French.

After the first circuit run to the Greek place called Zoe’s, pausing along the way to wave to Purple Haze on the elliptical at Planet Fitness.  #LunkAlarm  #TurnThatThingOffYouJackwagonsDumbbellsAreLoudWhenYouRackThem  Repeat the circuit then run to the Thai place called Bangkok Ocha and do the circuit.  Longish run to the end of the shopping center to the Chinese place cleverly named Great Wall of China and do the circuit, then run literally four feet to the Mexican place Cabo’s for the 100 rep circuit.  Finally run back to McDonald’s which we used to represent the greatest country in the history of countries, and the lone superpower on Earth, these United States of America. Being the American station, and being McDonald’s, the PAX were instructed to supersize the circuit and do 25 reps of each exercise.  The hashbrowns smelled delicious and deere lowered YHC misses carbohydrates.  Did McDonald’s actually need to pay McKinsey or some other high priced consultancy seven figures to tell them that all day breakfast was a good idea?  The executives could’ve simply gone to any store at 10:25 am and seen the mad rush for McMuffins and McGriddles and saved the shareholders some money.  Take one last inhale of carby, grainy, deliciousness and run to the picnic tables in front of CCHS.

At the tables find a bit of bench and perform 50 single leg split squats and 50 dips.  Once finished run to the mouth of Tartarus, the region of torments.  Go up the short ramps alternating between sprints and lunge walks until ascension of the summit, then run down the steps.  Seeing we still had a few minutes to spare after completion, we ran up the stairs and down the short ramps alternating between hard charges and recovery paces.  Run back to launch lot and circle up.

YHC likes to outsource Mary to the PAX under the guise of getting everyone involved.  The dirty little secret is that YHC’s form on most core exercises is as sloppy as Ole Miss’ recruiting in recent years.  #SeriouslyHughFreezeYouAren’tFoolingAnyoneYouFlthyCheater  We did the usual suspects for Mary ending with a plank and YHC’s favorite, zero burpees OYO.

Thanks to those who came out before golf and the site Q’s for the opportunity to lead.  YHC tried to get out of the proverbial comfort zone and lead a boot camp workout without relying on lifting rocks.  CCHS removing the rock pile was also a catalyst in that.  After careful consideration, the Rusty Onion was left off the Around the World roster since YHC felt that including a bar/pizza joint as Italy might cause consternation among any PAX of actual Italian descent.  Roll Tide.

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Chelms aka Tatertot
7 years ago

Great creativity although my form only lasts for 99 merkins. Around the world would be a good substitute for the beer mile. Drink a beer from each country.

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