Tunnel of Hate

  • When:05/30/2015
  • QIC: Frasier, Hairball
  • The PAX: Beaker, Purple Haze, Garbanzo, Dear Abby (WB), Sweetness, Spackler, Joker, Iron Horse (WD), Ike (FNG - Brad L.), Prohibition, Frasier (QIC), Hairball (QIC)


Tunnel of Hate

Disclaimer: Frasier, being down an arm had Siri dictate his portion of the backblast. Let the record reflect for any spelling/grammar issues. YHC typed his own and has no excuse for any errors/omissions.

Anyways, 12 men made the right choice on this fine Saturday and brought the heat to #F3DayZero. Old Glory was flying proudly on Garbanzo’s Apollo Creed-esque chubbies shorts long before the tip of the shovel flag was planted firmly (kinda) in the scorched earth. After a notably awkward disclaimer, we were off.

Here’s how the thang-a-lang went down:

Mosey to the soccer fields for COP:

-LBC x 25 IC

-Merkin x 15 IC

-Peter Parker x 20 IC

-Imperial Walker x 25 IC

-SSH x 31 IC

Lap around the school. Butt kicks, high knees, backward run.

Merkin clock: Circle up in plank position performing merkins at each position of the clock face: 1 merkin at 1:00, 2 merkins at 2:00, up to 12 at 12:00. Form began to deteriorate around bedtime between 9:00 and 10:00. Solid work gents, 78 merkins for those counting.

Mosey to the playground and partner up

Dips x 200 between the partners. Bear crawl up hill, crab walk down.

Supine pull ups x 100 between partners. Bear crawl up hill, crab walk down.

Mosey to wall – donkey kicks x25 OYO

Mosey to sidewalk ramp to soccer field. Line up along ramp. The pax planked between railings creating a tunnel arch that would make an engineer proud (maybe). Pax at bottom gorilla hop to top under the arch. Keep your arch high fellas #hangingchads. Pax on bars shift down one position. Repeat until all pax complete gorilla hop.

Repeat tunnel arch with bear crawl. Audible before full circuit due to a gas leak.

Mosey to basketball courts. After another round of the merkin clock in military time was vetoed, we hit 10 burpees OYO.

Handoff to handoff to the one-armed man.

Circle of pain:

The idea was to stay on the move while we work together as a group. Four corners around the track stopping at each corner for a pain station. Mosey and all you got in between the pain stations.

Round one:

Mosey to the first corner with a running rock. 5 to 10 pounds. First called exercise was the goblet squat. AYG to corner number two.  Calf raises and cadence to 30 while holding the rock above your head. Mosey to station three where we did step ups x 15. Extend your rock at the top of the step up. AYG to pain station four. 20 Turkish get ups with rock. AYG back to the start of turn one.

Round two:

First called exercise was to tap crunch with rock x 40.  Mosey to turn to where we did Russian twist x 20.

AYG to station three. There we did hip thrusters a.k.a. the “Saturday night special” to 20 then alternated right leg left leg up to 10. Mosey to station four. There we did up down in a circle as a wave while holding a rock with their feet. Probably easier. AYG back to the start.

Round three:

Jump squats with rock over your 20. AYG to station two. 20 jump lunges with rock over the head. Mosey the station where we did 15 jump ups. Audible to step up or jump squat unable to do the jump up.  AYG to station four.  Put your rock on the ground and jump over your rock back-and-forth 30 times.  Then jump 30 times sideways over your rock. Mosey back to station one.

Round four:

Dying cockroach x 20 with your rock. AYG back to the basketball court. For some Mary.

Combination flutter dolly times 20 with the rock.  100 LBCs to finish.

Ye Olde Moleskinne:

  • The heat and humidity are back. With Frasier’s busted paw, YHC focused on the guns to get things started. Coming out of the gates swinging with LBCs got the big-talkers going early.
  • Garbanzo’s American flag shorts were one of the highlights of the morning. They were short… Shorter than Semi Gloss’ copper shorts? Yep. Shorter than Iron Horse’s flowy running shorts? Probably. Fortunately partner leg throws were off the weinke this morning. During the partner work, the guys were getting after it.
  • Beaker and Dear Abby were crushing the dips and supine pull-ups while Joker and Spackler perfected the crab slide on the hill descent. Must have been saving some energy for the AYG sprints because both were flying around the track.
  • No love on the tunnel today. Venture through the tunnel at your own risk. A notable aroma of stale beer and methane lingered heavy in the humid air.
  • The hip thrusters on the wall looked without a doubt were the “weekly questionable-looking exercise at DZ.” Fortunately, no passers-by witnessed the display of flexibility. Several guys claimed #wheelhouse on this one. We’ll take your word for it.
  • A brief moment of silence was observed as we rounded “Frasier’s Corner” on the track. Fortunately this week all pax kept the wheels down and no casualties were noted.
  • Next time you’re at coffeteria, have Spack show you how to eat a cake pop at Starbucks. The barista was impressed.
  • Welcome FNG “Ike.” You made the right choice today. Way to get after it today – we look forward to seeing you out again next week.
  • Good to see the regular crew and some new faces out at #F3DayZero. I hope everyone enjoyed it as much as we did.

Announcements:

Joker noted that F3 Area 51 started almost 4 years ago and had grown from 1 workout to >30. T-Claps to the leadership of the men and growth of F3 in South Charlotte.

Two races coming in June with several Pax already signed up:

  • Tread Nightly: 6/19 – Join in for a night trail race at the Whitewater Center. 4 mile & Half Marathon options at USNWC. Stick around after the race for live music and good beer. (Register: http://usnwc.org/play/whitewater-race-series/tread-nightly/)
  • NoDa 5K: Friday 6/6 – NoDa Brewing was a big supporter of F3 Golf. Help show our appreciation and sign up now. Run the race then hang around after for some of the best brews in town. (Register: https://noda5k.racesonline.com/register)

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Joker
8 years ago

Garbanzo’s shorts weren’t really shorts. They were more like underwear. I’m certain they violated the mcalpine elementary dress code.

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